I warned ya

I've decided my first blog back needs to be exceptionally boring. So here it is.

I have a dilemma. I can't stand perfume! I love the idea of perfume. I need all the help I can get, but I can't handle it. It makes me sick to my stomach. Just so you know I don't hate perfume on other people. If it is really strong I may have to move away slightly, but I'll scoot closer when it wears down. Don't you worry! I would love to be that women that strolls by and leaves an amazing scent as she goes. But to this day I cannot find a perfume that I like on me. I just can't seem to find a wet dirt and dill perfume, or slightly chlorinated water splashed on hot bricks perfume, or old book closet perfume, or ground chalk perfume, or... well you get it. I don't want to smell sweet, fruity, flowery, or like anything off my baking shelf. Is that so bad? I've been conducting a lengthy unsuccessful search. I have even smelled every scent I can find from I Hate Perfume. Guess what? It all smells like perfume. I'll admit It's a tad closer to what I'm looking for and I haven't been able to find all the scents. So there is still hope.
I would love to know if there is anything you all have seen (or smelled) that you think I might like.

It really is not fair to Chris. He loves perfume. I also really love cologne on him. He wears Cool Water. The best men's fragrance ever known to man. I don't care if it is sooo two decades ago and you can buy it at Ross Dress For Less! Nothing is better than a whiff of Chris's neck when he gets home from work. A hint of Cool Water and salt. Is that too much information? Sorry.

I think I need to create my own line. Does anyone know how to get started on that? I always get nutty looks when I try to explain this to others though. I think I might be my only customer.


Darilyn said...

Welcome back girl.

I'm sure there are tons of people like you looking for a scent like you are. And you should create your own line of perfume. You definitely should.

And lastly, I for one appreciate you using the full name of my favorite store. : )

Aundrea said...

I think I like the same scents as you! I might be a loyal customer if you get this thing started.

We've talked about this before, but I l-o-v-e Cool Water too!!

Brian said...

I also love a whiff of Chris' neck after he gets home from work...well pretty much anytime is great...:-)

As for you Mer, WELCOME BACK!!! I CAN'T believe that you are here! Were you busy catching up on LOST or something? Now that you're back, don't EVER leave again. We need you.

Rochelle said...

GAP had a spray that smelled like grass, loved it!

megan said...

no no no I totally get it. I don't like perfume either. I have tried and I just can't handle it. Reuben likes all the flowery what not smells from Victoria's secret and I think they are awful (anyone who does enjoy them I just don't like them on me. I can handle them on other people) I would so buy those perfumes from you if you started your own line.

also thank you for blogging again

megan said...

I just looked up and found that Demeter is supposed to have unique smells like dirt and crayon perfumes.

"One of Demeter Fragrance Library most popular fragrances is called "Dirt" and has crisp green notes and a mossy woody base, reminescent of dirt. The range also includes a shower gel, so you can proudly say "I clean myself with dirt!" Other Demeter Fragrance Library fragrances include "Grass", "Paint", "Greenhouse" and "Gingerbread"

Janalee said...

What about that old hippy favorite - pochouli?

Ashley said...

I would love to smell what you come up with. And I don't think I'll ever look at Chris the same again :)

Sheri said...

Most perfume smells like old ladies too me. Even the perfume I wear (Spellbound by Estee Lauder) I don't think they even make it anymore - I still have the same bottle from 4 Christmas' ago.

I tend to like the "spicer" scents and not the flowery ones.

Good luck on finding dirt in a bottle :) - seriously, you crack me up!

Elizabeth said...

Well, it's about time you returned to blogland! :-) I'm afraid the next time I see Chris's neck, it'll be red with embarrassment! :-) I'd buy the old books scent, if you could re-create it somehow.

brenda said...

I LOVE your playlist. LOVE it.

I'm with you on the perfume thing. I might maybe like a whiff of something, but then I actually get a massive headache if I wear it or sit near it. So it's good I'm in Primary and not RS. Ha ha.

I used to work in a little bath boutique place as a teenager in Corvallis. We carried a bunch of natural oil fragrances people could wear. There was stuff like patchouli, which is great if you are going to the country fair in Veneta, or just trying to cover the scent of pot and body odor. J/K But there were also scents like "rain." So I used to wear those but don't know where they can be found now. Probably at the country fair.

brenda said...

Remember that Seinfeld when Kramer wanted to invent a fragrance called "Beach," but CK beat him to it?

Come on, any Seinfeld fans out there?

Mahina said...

i'm afraid i can't be of much help! i'm not much of a perfume girl myself! i like perfume in the bottle, but my skin must create some freak mutation because it always smells yucky on me after the first minute! i just go au natural!